Friday, July 29, 2011

How to make 5 hours seem like 5 days...

Hmmmm. Steve came upstairs and I thought he was coming to bed, so I cut short my very interesting and funny conversation with my sister of the soul, India - I'm talking about you - and then he went back downstairs. Well hell. I guess this is one way to get me to write in my blog!

Today dad had an appointment at the VA. Oy... I don't mind taking him to the doctor, I really don't, I actually LIKE to take him, because then I know what's going on with him, health-wise, but today was quite literally the... POOPS. I won't go into detail, suffice it to say that dad came home in a diaper and 2 hospital gowns, because apparently the VA doesn't know men wear anything other than a size medium PJ pants. Quite interesting. Thankfully, since I have cloth car seats, we all came out of the situation unscathed. Except for dad's dignity, I think that was bruised a bit.
Dr. Greene thinks his shin pain are shin splints, possibly caused by mineral deficiencies. I'm open to suggestions. She did more bloodwork to double check and hopefully we'll hear soon. His HgA1c was higher than last time. He was a perfect 6.0 in April, but it's up to 7.3 now. Working on getting dad to drink more water that keeps his blood diluted enough that his blood sugar stays on the higher end of normal, which is as good as we can hope for by now.

It was just a really busy day. Dr. Greene was running behind, dad and I were late getting to the hospital because we had to stop at SW precinct for dad's billfold, which was with Mel at the VA already because we didn't get the message that she'd meet us there. Dad took his insulin without eating anything because Missy didn't wake up until noon and didn't fix anything for him, but dad was worried about missing the insulin. He doesn't remember that he HAS to eat when he takes the insulin. Thankfully he didn't get hypoglycemic, although I would have shared my lunch with him if he had. I had an Almond Joy for lunch (and breakfast - one half for each meal). I had a water chaser too, that was special. No pain pills either, until 5:45 p.m. Maybe that's what made the day so long. Mel and dad got into it about his phone (yes, again.... Wait, maybe it's still....) She left for a job interview for a part time job on that note. It has to be so hard to live with him when he's so difficult. I know I couldn't deal with it on a day to day basis. When I took dad home this afternoon Missy told me that dad went to a neighbor's house and used his phone to call Pam last night. I'm not pointing fingers, believe me, but how did he manage to get out of the house to even go to the neighbors? He makes it so difficult to keep an eye on him.

I'm anxious to hear from the VA to find out about whether dad got on the admission list or not. I seriously don't know what we're going to do if he didn't. We, and that includes me, just can't give him the kind of care he needs - and we sure as hell don't have the money to pay for a regular nursing home. He would HAVE to sell the house before he could be eligible for Medicaid and then where would he live while waiting to be placed? I'd love to say we could find room for him here - well to be honest, we COULD find room for him here, but I know I can't take care of him by myself and Steve, yeah, oh boy, Steve. That's the biggest fly in the ointment. He doesn't like dad and doesn't make any bones about it, so he probably wouldn't even LET dad stay here, even if my health would allow me to be able to care for him.

Another little incident happened this week too, dad went to Boyd and Charlie's for dinner. Apparently Missy took him over there and dropped him off (does anyone understand what dementia means?) and left her phone number with someone at the restaurant so they could call when dad was done with dinner and she'd come pick him up. Well, nobody called until they noticed dad was gone, so when Missy found him he was about 2 blocks from there, shuffling alone, in 100 degree heat. Can you feel the frustration? If I say anything to either one of the sisters, then they get mad at me and tell me if I can do better to go ahead and do it, which they know I can't, so we're back at square one, only no one is talking to anyone. I'm not bringing these things up as a criticism of my sisters personally, just staying that dad requires more care than he can get at home. Period. Something needs to be done before he gets hurt. Worse.

I have to wonder what his darling wife had to say to him yesterday. Wonder if she even noticed he hadn't called her for a couple weeks. Probably not. I told Mel today that maybe we need to stop making the house payment to pay for someone to come in during the day to be with dad. Can't make the house payment and get someone to come in both, there just isn't enough money - so it has to be one or the other. What do people do in situations like this? I'm sure my dad isn't the only person in the country who can't afford nursing home care or in home care and still be able to afford living expenses. I sure feel like we're the only people dealing with this though.

I'd like to end this on a happier note, but there just isn't one today. Well, I did get to come home and Steve fixed dinner AND took care of the dishes. I guess that's a pretty happy note. La la la la la.... Ben missed me while I was gone too. Poor little guy, I took a pain pill and we tried to nap before dinner. I'm so glad I have him - he's my best buddy.

My funny photo of the day - doesn't Matt look like a Conehead?

1 comment:

India said...

I think Steve is trying to shut us up. Too much info can make women too smart! lOL....