I hate deer season. Hate, hate, hate it.

It's times like this when I know that Steve doesn't know or understand how I feel, physically or emotionally. I cannot handle being home alone with six dogs. I love my dogs to death, they are an extension of me and they're the only ones who are there for me when I really feel like crap. However, when I feel like crap, I cannot take care of all 6 of them. And not only does Steve HAVE to go deer hunting, he has to go for five days - he's gone for 2 days before the season even opens! What the hell? Friday morning I got up, went to the bathroom and came back to bed to find that Cookie had peed in the bed. And in all her littleness, she didn't miss a thing but the pillows! So I had to strip the bed, carry everything downstairs, wash, dry, and remake the bed. It's time like that, that I really miss my little trailer. Everything was on one floor. Here I can stay on the main floor, but the washer and dryer are still downstairs and I can't carry a full laundry basket upstairs anymore. It's easy to shove stuff DOWN, but it's another matter altogether to get it back UP.

I had a good day today, I really did. Went to Goodwill and found a pair of jeans and then I went to Wal-Mart and got dad some Husker pajama pants and a Husker ball cap (he never wears a ball cap, but he told me today he wanted one...) for his birthday, and a card. Matt was going to bring Hails over today, but but she had a bad case of vomiting at Bagel Bin, so they decided to stay home. I asked Matt if I could stop by there, so I got her a couple sticker books and a color books, and I stopped by there. She was so happy to see me and I was thrilled to see her too! We visited for a little bit - we played with her sticker book and she colored a bit, and then we read some books. She has a harmonica and she was so cute playing with that! She blow a note and then she'd laugh and giggle, play another note, laugh and giggle, I wish I would have had my iPod with me, or my camera that does videos, she was so damn cute! Magann said Hailey was going to be over during the week, so they'd try to stop over. I hope so. It's been a month since I saw her and I can't believe how much she's changed! You could understand her before, but she still talked a lot of baby talk that you kind of had to figure out what was going on... Now she talks and talks and talks, and only rarely is hard to understand. She wanted to call Stephen on the phone, but he wasn't home. She loves to talk to him. We talked about everybody in Stephen's family and how much she loves baby Kaylee... She's growing up SO fast... She told me about her hayrack ride at the pumpkin patch, and the bee on her apple at the orchard. It's hard to believe she's only 2!

Anyway, by the time I got hom I was hurting pretty bad. Like, I actually called Meg to see if she could come feed the dogs bad. She was busy tonight, Jason had a show at Northwest, I think she said, so that was out. Mom was going out to dinner with Sue and Smitty, so that was out. I may or may not have dropped a few F bombs, and took a pain pill and crawled into bed. The dogs just had to wait. They weren't happy, but I just couldn't do it. Tomorrow Mel, Meg, and I are going to Grand Island for dad's birthday, and then, FINALLY, on Monday Steve will be home. I swear to God, this is the LAST freaking year I'm going to stay here by myself. We'll see how I am by Monday.  Steve did call tonight - we had a lousy connection (how ironic is that?). Brett got a big buck today, only 3 points, but Steve said it must weight about 250 pounds, bigger than anyone (from their group) has ever gotten. Cool. Wish Steve had gotten a couple so he could just come home. As if...

I went to see Dr. S on Friday. We had a little chat about whether or not this stuff that I've noticed lately is due to MCTD or fibro... He noticed that he hadn't had an ANA or any other rheumatological blood tests done since Dr. Klein had done them last, so we got those. I like Dr. S, I really do, but I felt again like I used to feel when I first got sick. Nothing we can do about the possible esophageal problems because they aren't constant. He can order the tests, but if I'm not having the problem every day, so the tests really wouldn't show anything. sigh... We'll see what the blood work shows. The last ANA was negative, but that was the first negative one in quite some time, so we'll see how things stand now. I'm going to stay on the Savella until the end of December, if I haven't noticed some relief by then, he'll taper me off that. I kind of think to myself that if I'm not getting relief from a fibro drug, doesn't that make sense that maybe it's not fibro pain? He did change my hydrocodone to the 10/325, so I can take 2 at a time if I need to without going over my Tylenol limit for the day. That's some good news I guess. Save a little bit of my liver anyway. Ha ha ha... Small joke. That's about it, I guess, until I get those results. Happy Veteran's Day to all my friends and family who are vets - even if they don't read my rambling... I'm so proud of you and all you did to keep us free.

This and That for November!

	Reverently, Quietly .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Isn't this a great shirt? I want it! My old prednisone shirt is looking a little worn!

I love this picture of Hailey - When I see it I think of the Primary Song "Reverently, Quietly" (which you should be able to hear when you click on the green button in the above song bar), but I have to confess that she folds her arms when she's ticked off and I just happened to catch her with her eyes closed! There was nothing reverent or quiet about this picture!

Steve is off on another killing spree... Don't worry, only Bambi and her mama are in danger! I hate this week of the year, absolutely hate it! I don't particularly care for deer meat and I don't know why he goes if we're not going to eat the meat. He hasn't actually shot a deer for years now anyway - probably just an excuse to go away and play with the boys for a week or so. Wish I could find a good excuse to do the same!

As usual, with Steve gone, one of the dogs have to have a health problem. Ruger got up this morning and wouldn't eat his breakfast. I called the vet, because of his Cushings I tend to take his health a little more seriously than I do the others. Dr. Jesske called back about 4:30 to see how he was doing. I still hadn't been able to coax him to eat or drink anything. I even tried putting his bowl of food on the table by the chair, because he loves to eat anything that might be left on that table for say... 2 seconds! Still, he hadn't touched it. Dr. J said to bring him on in for a couple injections of fluid since he hadn't been drinking, and a steroid shot. He asked when Ruger had his last Lysodren pill and I really don't know if Steve remembered to give it to him on Wednesday or not, so he said we'll just hold it until Ruger is past this crisis. Tomorrow he has to go back in for blood work. I noticed his tummy is becoming a little bare again and his hair is falling out by the handful - might be time to adjust his meds again. Poor sweetie. He always looks so worried! His eyebrows have turned white in the past couple months, which gives him a perpetual Eeyore look.

Hailey was here this week - so it was a good week. She has grown another tooth - that makes 5! So she now has 3 on the top and 2 on the bottom. This week she perfected her walking backward skill and is holding her hands over her head and twirling around so she can dance more with The Wiggles now! I can't wait for Christmas and watch her with the DVD we got her that has some of her favorite songs on it. The one we watch now is good, but not so much familiar stuff on it. She just LOVES The Wiggles!

The excitement of the first snow is over! We had a couple inches last night. I didn't mind the snow as much as hearing branches fall on the roof because the snow was so wet and heavy. Of course the dogs are on high alert because Daddy is gone, so every little sound makes them very nervous. Consequently, they barked until almost midnight at every bump and creak, which of course creeped me out and made me nervous. It was a vicious circle! By 4:30 when I took Ruger to the vet, the streets were all just dry with wet spots from the melting snow (which will turn to ice tonight, with an expected low of 29). There's still snow on the grass in most places, but it's all fallen out of the trees and walking wasn't too bad. As I was watching it fall last night I kept wondering who was going to shovel the driveway and sidewalks today. I knew I sure wasn't. I have no idea how to use the snow blower, and I don't even know if it has gas in it yet! We were expecting 3-6", and I thought it might be a problem, but it wasn't. Whew. Dodged that bullet!

Still dealing with Missy's lack of comprehension where the English language is concerned. Mel needed to work a lot of OT this weekend, but Missy had a headache. She went to Ray's yesterday at 4 p.m. and Mel told her she really needed to get back to work last night and today to get the OT in. Of course Ray's truck has bad tires (oh yea...) and she couldn't make it home until noon today. I might have more sympathy for Missy if she didn't get headaches whenever someone expected her to do something, or if she got the shot, then came home instead of spending the night with her man du jour. All I'm concerned with is dad, but if you try to say anything to her, she takes it as a personal attack.

Looks like they're going to have to lock up the medicine at home. (I hope they can find a lockbox big enough to hold Missy's stash.) Friday Missy was going to give dad his noon meds when she discovered that all of Friday's pills were gone. She called Mel to see if she should give him more. (I'm not even going there...) I called Dr. Green to check on the status of all the paperwork she has, and the nurse called me back because she was concerned about possible interactions with the medications if they were taken all at once. He didn't have to go in, but we had a good discussion about safety measures for dad at home. Mel said he's been up late at night and she heard him on the phone with Pam one night about 2:30. I'm wondering about Sundowners. He came downstairs one night at 10 p.m. to take his 3 p.m. medications because he thought it was afternoon... We're afraid that he might fall down the stairs while he's wandering. He won't use the walker that we borrowed from Bob and Carole. I told Mel we're just going to have to follow him around with the walker. Every time he goes into the living room, put the walker right next to him. If he goes into the dining room, but the walker next to him. Constantly remind him that he has to use it. He has a lot of pain in his knees, especially since his last round of falls. I'm worried about the multi-level house too. Lots of things to worry about. We need to try to get Missy to understand that he simply CANNOT be left alone. Mel has told her this time and time again, yet she'll leave him at home while she runs errands. It'll only take seconds to fall, and we all know Missy's "errands" can last for hours.

One good thing is the VA had sent dad a list of Adult Daycares that he would be able to use. (I hate that term - adult daycare...) Anyway, one on the list was Sarah Care on 132nd and Maple. Mel did a tour last week and it sounded great. Dad is qualified for the VA to pay for 2 days per week until March 2011 - that's good news! Now, when Missy doesn't show up after a night out, Mel can just take dad there and he'll be taken care of. That's a BIG relief - too bad he doesn't qualify for more days - but we'll be happy with what we get.

Hailey goes back to the doctor this week on Thursday to see if her leg had been fractured. She's been getting around on it this week with no problems, so I don't know what to think. Well, I know what to think, but I'm not saying! We'll see what the doctor thinks!