Monday, February 7, 2011

Patience is a Virtue - I must not have much virtue

Went this morning to talk to Candi at Immanuel Village about dad. I really hate it when in talking to someone you realize something that you don't even want to admit to yourself. There's no way dad is going to be able to live in assisted living. By the time we're done with Medicaid waivers and all their hoop jumping, and the VA gets their information and make a final determination, it could take months. With the rapid decline in dad's health and his memory, not to mention his just plain old Swedish disposition, skilled care is what we're looking at. I never once in a million years pictured my dad in a nursing home. Never, ever, ever, ever. Apparently he never did either, which is why he never purchased long-term care insurance or saved any money. Terrific.

Whatever the outcome, I feel so good to have talked to Candi today. She was very helpful and just made me see things are not as good as I want to believe they are. We can't get dad to work with us, he needs to be someplace he can't wander off (eventually), and he has the issues with his medication and not even being able to see to load his insulin syringe. I didn't want to see that assisted living wouldn't be the best place. I guess I just can't imagine dad in a skilled care facility.
Life goes on though, whether you want it to, or not.

Shorty had to be put to sleep this morning. She got into a fight with Zoe and Zoe did so much damage to Shorty's trachea she had to be put down. I'm so MAD at myself for even giving Shorty to Missy. Shorty had been having aggression issues for the past couple of months and they had been getting worse and worse, so today this fight happened and Shorty was on the losing end. The only reason it got this bad was because Missy wouldn't take her to the vet. She told me Shorty would go to the vet in December, then in January, and here it is nearly the middle of February and she couldn't take her because she didn't have any money. She has money for everything else she wants, including a skin care kit that cost over $500, but no money to take care of her dogs? I have no sympathy for her. I do feel sorry for Shorty though, more than I can say. I thought it would be a good home and I was most certainly wrong. That's going to prey on my conscience for a long time.

Missy, however, is back in her groove - loving all the attention losing her dog has brought. She and dad both think Mel should apologize to her. I'm baffled trying to figure out why it's Mel's fault that Missy can't take care of her dogs. Everyone else managed to keep the Shorty separated from Zoe and Medusa, except for Missy. Dad told me that Missy told him the kids let Shorty out of Adam's room. Adam says Shorty was still in his room when he left for school. With her history, I'm much more liable to believe Adam than I am Missy. What a mess. The wedge between everyone just gets wider and wider.

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